What Happened?

When did I go wrong?

How did I get to this point?

No way to turn back the clock!

To change what I didn't or did do?

Is there a way to fix the choices I made?

What do I do now?

Let go of regret!
&
Learn grow

The journey of my life continues
Reminding me
Change is normal it means I'm learning

A Memory of Mom

 

A Memory of Mom

By Mary K. Mennenga

As I was doing laundry the other day, I heard a sound making me feel both sad yet comforting at the same time. I didn't understand how or why, it was affecting me so strongly. Went down to fold my last load of laundry. Grabbed a tee shirt laid it out and realized, it was me. All the memories came flooding back, of taking my Mom to the laundromat to do her washing. A great time saver, while doing her washing we spent time chatting, in no time we were folding clothes, my memory of  hearing her tapping out wrinkles using her finger tips, then packing up to go home or out for lunch. It all makes sense I'm  folding the same way Mom did, by tapping out the wrinkles using my finger tips. My hands are weak and Mom's were old. 

Mom been gone for years now, her words of wisdom and love are still with me and always will. I realize how lucky I've been, having had my Mother as my best friend. I don't miss her often because, I feel her love all around me. With so many great memories, of and about her along with my whole family. When our whole family gets together it's easy to feel her peaceful presence of love around all us.

When we allow a person into our heart

The love and memories shared

Stay with you always

    

With our lack of snow, been walking more.

Nacho has loved our lack of snow, we have been able to walk down to the Mississippi River. Using Map My Walk .com Once it starts really warming up, the number of deer ticks, will rise making the risk of getting bitten too great. Having m.s. is bad enough, adding lyme's disease into the mix. No thank you very much. Once it stays above 50 for a week, walking there will end, until we have a hard freeze sometime in November. This has been the first year since moving to the  city of Minneapolis, I've been able to walk the Mississippi River Parkways, all because of our lack of snow. 

Most of the time we still have a blanket of snow in wooded places like this.

Piles of snow and ice from the snow plows clearing the roads is already gone.

This year has been, the earliest the snow has been gone for the streets and everywhere, having grown up here I can't remember a time it clear of snow and ice this soon. Last year we had more snow on the ground, than we had all this winter. Our largest snow fall this winter was yesterday the 24 March 2015 it was only 3 to 4 inches, the only snow we see today is on the grass. May end up losing more trees because, there wasn't a blanket of snow, to stop the roots from freezing. 

Nacho hasn't minded the lack of snow, been enjoying laying in the yard watching the birds. Nacho keeps trying to get the squirrels to drop the peanuts I feed them in the front yard, The squirrels out smart him by dropping them on the other side of the fence.

A few of the pictures I took from our walks

The frozen Mississippi a few short weeks ago 

The Minnehaha Creek falls

Minneapolis downtown skyline

The University of Minnesota

HWY 94 bridge

over the Mississippi River

  

The Mississippi River bluffs

In the month of March Nacho and I have walked 45 miles taking 19 hours to do it. With little snow and ice it's been cold, so no worries about getting over heated. M.S. did mess me up left leg hurt with every step, then stopped working. Using different muscle groups it's working good so far, the human body is amazing in it's ability to adapt to change. Walking with Nacho is my favorite thing to do. Would be nice if my hands and arms worked better, a bit harder to fix not as many large muscle groups to work with. Doing my best with what I've got to work with.

Living is a choice I choose to make everyday. Won't buy into the negative, it's a waste of time. Instead I rise to the challenge of the day already knowing it will be what I make it. Life is to short to worry about things I have no control of. That's just about everything, expect me.  Find joy in the odd little things of the day and smile. 

Time for a walk with Nacho, he's outside waiting for me.

# 2 New writtings

Looking down from Heaven

By Mary K Mennenga

Yes I understand

Last piece of living done

The love I carry everyday 

Never judged always loved

Unique, independent

Taught to make my own path

Learned of generations past

To find happiness

Focus on here and now

Respect history 

Give and take

Not take and keep

Not gone

Best parts of me

Came from you

Your love

My blanket of peace

Basics don't change

Love always your

Dither daughter

 

Writing again feels oh so good!

Very glad I was able to get a new desk top computer, using a normal size wireless keyboard with a screen big enough, to see what I'm writing as I write it. Happy dancing in my head.

Not being able to write, has been hard having thoughts stuck in my head for too long. At first I spent days then weeks, working at putting my thoughts together on my computer and out of my head, was so frustrating, after looking at what I had written the day before, none it made sense it felt like a complete waste of my time. So I stopped wasting my time, something I despise doing because of limitations of my time and energy. 

Instead I decided doing something Nacho and I both, enjoy doing together going for walks. At first I wasn't sure how far we were walking my friend and neighbor told me about mapmywalk.com now I plan route or input the route after we get back.  I first started using it in the last week of July 2014. Since then Nacho and I have logged 380 miles, I count them as Nacho's smiles. In 148 walks, spending 132 hours walking. The longest walk we took was 6.31 miles. Have needed to replace my walker twice, I'm on my sixth set of wheels, if I count the set that came with the walkers. I'm going to try waiting until spring, to replace them for the seventh time, the salt and sand eats them away so fast. 

 Thought I would lose the use of my leg's first, how silly of me  thinking I knew what m.s. would do next. Instead it's been the muscles in my fingers, hands and wrists are getting weaker. Control of my fingers grabbing holding on yep dropping, knocking stuff over, cleaning up little messes mostly water. My computer and power strip are safely out of harms way. Being a two finger typist, having four fingers on each hand, is really helpful!!

As always I do what I can, when I can for as long as I'm able.

New computer with wireless mouse and keyboard which I love.

a Apple mini mac.

The Minnehaha Creek frozen Falls

in South Minneapolis, Minnesota.

Photo taken on a 5.04 miles walk with Nacho

On Monday the 2nd of March. 

   

Computer crashed

     After my dell crashed the hard drive for the 2nd time in 

four years. Did more research asking for a computer with

better compatible with different software makers. Learning a

totally new operating system isn't as hard as I thought, it's a

Apple Mac mini desk top, the monitor is a samsung with

a 22 inch wide screen, wireless keyboard and mouse. in the

four years I had my laptop, I didn't use it much outside of the

house more than a few times. My hands have gotten weaker

having a normal size keyboard has made typing a lot easier,

the bigger screen has made reading easier, Not needing my

reading glasses to see is wonderful. I have three pair of

reading glasses of different powers I don't need to find, a time

saver for sure. The bonus is now Jane and I can watch nature

shows, movies and youtube videos online together. This

system is working better then my laptop ever did.

Now I can get back to writing again.

Yep I'm Happy dancing inside my head finally! 

My best friend

The best parts about my best friend are, the love we share is seen in our actions. One look at us walking in our neighborhood, you’ll see we are like two peas in a pod and we respect each other too much to push and other to far, knowing we aren't the same. However we make each other feel safe no matter where we go or what we do. We spend every day looking forward to what we’ll do together. We face each challenge before us head on, when I fall my best friend is always beside me offering support, standing firm on his four legs until I’m standing on my two feet once again. The best part of our friendship is he understands my limitations can get me down. Knowing he needs me, as much as I need him, makes it easier to stay positive and let the negative fall away. Negative energy burns too hot and out too fast, to be useful anyway.

My best friend 

Downtown Minneapolis skyline taken form the Lake Street bridge, over the Mississippi River. On a walk Nacho and I took together this week. It's been warm here, so much of the snow we had has melted away, Nacho and I have been able to go for so nice long slow walks.