Friday, November 30, 2012

Didn't even think this could happen!

Of course if it has anything to do with muscles, M.S. can and does toss a huge monkey wrench into living life. Dealing with changes M.S. continually forces me to make, I'll bottled it up inside, not sharing it with anyone. Yes my silly pride still gets in my way. Thinking I could hide it by not speaking unless I had to, using two to four words answers this worked for a while when it stopped. Using every trick I knew to prevent people from noticing. Go as far as blaming people for not listening to me! The last time I said that to Jane, she got an odd look on her face and said “I don’t understand you, it sounds like your talking in a different language!” As she said it the feelings of guilt washed over me. Finally telling Jane everything, it had started back in July, with my words coming out in the wrong order, to the point where my words coming out more as sounds than words! No I did not have a stroke! It’s my M.S. slowly progressing. The tongue is made up of whole bunch of muscles and it’s also an organ. Any hoot! The muscles of my tongue are being affected by M.S. fatigue and spasticity so they’re not working right or as a team most of the time. I'm able to talk it just takes longer to get my words out, in a way that people can understand me. The longer I talk the harder it is to speak clearly. It’s another adjustment in the long list of adjustments I've had to make because of M.S. I admit this is the hardest adjustment I've had to make by far. As always I’ll continue to find ways to work around and within my ever changing limitations.

After many years of talking on the phone, for far too long with many different people M.S. has quieted and calmed my long windiness. Not really a bad thing because, I tend to talk way too much anyway. As with most of the ability M.S. has taken, I've learned new ways of doing what I want to keep doing. With this one I've noticed how much emotion, comes from the words people use or maybe it's because I wasn't paying attention. Yep, over time I do seem to find a positive way of looking at the adjustments, I've had to make as I travel through my life. There are more than enough negatives in life, I choose not to hold on to them too long. That's all!

The training with Nacho is going great, he now understands the hand signs, the noise I make as well as the number of clicks of most of the commands used on his walks. Very glad he's a smart dog or he would be pulling me around and down on our walk's

This is the look I get from Nacho when it's time to play!
He still is a puppy!


Muffie said...

I only had speech problems for a very short time, and before I was diagnosed. I can imagine how difficult it must be for you. Would therapy help at all? Nacho is such a little sweetheart!!

Mary K. Mennenga said...

My doctors is looking into it,but she doesn't think so because it's the muscles that are suffering from fatigue. I see her on the 4 of December.
Yes he is and finds more ways to entertain us. Thanks Muff for your comment. Mary

Brad Best said...

You are such a strong individual who keeps her head up, its admiring. Much love to You & Jane.

Karen said...

Oh, Nacho is a cutie!

I'm sorry to hear of your speech problem.

It surprises me when I find out just what MS can affect. I went to the eye doc this week, I can't read for more than 10 minutes, without my vision going blurry. The doc said, "Not much I can do. Your eye muscles are being affected by the MS. I can't fix that with glasses".

So, there you have it, anything involving muscles, eyes, tongue etc, can be f*&^%$ by the MonSter.

Mary K. Mennenga said...

Hey Brad, got to other wise I'll only see the ground, and miss out on all the good stuff. Love to also my friend:)

Karen, I agree it really gets in the way. Every organ has a muscle that will affect it, sooner or later do wish it could wait until much... later... Have a good weekend.

kmilyun said...

Late as usual with the comment but just will add: Nacho is so darn cute!

Mary K. Mennenga said...

It's Never too late to share, that you think Nacho is cute! Nacho man loves it when I sing his song, even if I can only hum it.LOL