Wednesday, November 23, 2011

This Thanksgiving is different.

For the first time in my life I don't feel it's necessary, to go anywhere for Thanksgiving. Jane and I decided we are going to stay home, it's the first time that it will be just the two us. Got all the fixings before the snow started falling. A good thing because it's really coming down, no it's not a repeat of last fall yet. It will warm up and be gone before Turkey day. The first snow fall of winter was a mix of wet heavy snow, sleet and the white fluffy stuff. It has all become ice and I'm really glad I don't drive any more!

With my physically abilities slowly slipping away, things are a bit more challenging that's all! Still not giving in or giving up that continues as always, and picking my battles very carefully. Being more cautious about where and what I'm putting my energy into. With limited resources I don't waste it, by knowing the choices I make have ramifications, that can and have stopped me dead in my tracks, taking day's or even weeks to recover from. Finding a balance isn't easy when I don't know what I'll have to work with each day.

My new normal is a loss that I'm not adjusting to very well, it started a while ago, with a high pitched ringing in my ears. Have I mention how much I loathe and despise high pitched noise, it's very distracting to the point that it's almost impossible to get and stay focused. When it drops down a few octaves its much easier to deal with, no need to worry I'll find ways of work around it. In the last few weeks I've noticed I fatigue faster and it's taking longer to recover, with these two things it's affecting my ability to communicate verbally and to write. Change isn't one of my strong suits, honestly I've never handled change well. It's the reason I call change adjustments makes me feel more in control, I prefer to face life head on with open eye's.  

The adjustments I've made to lower my stress level. First I'm not going use chat on face book,  the type is too small for me to see. The second is talking on the  telephone, some folks will find this hard to believe because, I could and did spend hours talking on the phone mostly with Mom. When talking with other people much longer then they wanted too. I've been told this many times, "You can turn a ten minute phone call into an hour or more!" a bit like my mother. Now I don't even answer the phone because, it's so frustrating trying to listen and talk, after I hang up, trying to remember why they had called what it was all about I even started taking notes Grrrr. It's just gotten to be too much of a hassle, face to face is easier to handle but, the best way I think is to just use e-mail, this way they can respond, when they have time. So far it's working out great for me, no longer do I need to give it a second thought, if I'm bugging them or not.       


Kim @ Stuff could... said...

The ringing in the ears would be hard to deal aunt has that problem (she does not have MS).

We do have to chose how to use our limited energy. Hope you have a good Thanksgiving anyways.

Kit Minden, katepoet said...

Keep on truckin'! You have a great attitude, and it's good to read about your path through MS and life.

Karen said...

I prefer to spend the holidays quietly. I hope you have a peaceful day.

Diane J Standiford said...

I completely agree. Emails--the best, lately it seems my friends want to IS a time eater and my finers, my eyes...sigh. I am not a big phone talker anymore, holding the phone, even on speaker,just so exhausting. Listening is hard work! You just have a nice relaxing holiday. People who truly care will understand. Happy Thanksgiving my MS friend!

Mary K. Mennenga said...

Thank you all for your kindness and understanding. It will be a relaxing holiday not needing to climb stairs, or missing the rose parade because somebody want to watch the pregame show. Hope you all have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Mary K. Mennenga said...

Oops I meant the Macy's Thanksgiving day parade.