Wednesday, October 26, 2011

#32 Fighting an unseen foe

Fighting an unseen foe
For Karen as she began waging war against
Colon Cancer

You didn't even know of it's existence until a short time ago
Getting you're head around what's happened and what's next
Your not one to play the blame game
Or feeling sorry for yourself 
Instead you've chosen to fight with every tool you have
Keep in mind that fighting and pushing yourself too hard
Will only weaken you
Learning to lean on those who love you for assistance
Is an adjustment that's hard to make
The price for not making it will cost you even more
In terms of energy you'll need to fight
So pick you're battles carefully
Your patience will continue to be tested
Because you want to do things for yourself
The question is should you?
If yes let no one get in your way!
Remember the stronger you are the longer you're in control of
Of your choices
Take each day as it comes
Live knowing what's important is being with the people you love
Making the most of the time we have
By doing our best to live life
Holding nothing back

By Mary K. Mennenga
Karen M. Helin
October 4, 2011

Monday, October 24, 2011

# 31 Reflections If you could see past disability

If you could see past disability
By Mary K. Mennenga

To see the person
Who isn't willing to quit or given up
On living life, hope and love
Life is about
Making the most out of what I've got to work with
It's not about what I can no longer do
Instead it's learning new ways of working within the limitations
Living life has brought to all of us
Pride is a force that will need to be dealt with
It's one of the things that can defeat anyone
Remember I'm are still in control of my choices
Will I make mistakes of course that's how most learning gets done!
All I ask is your understanding that
If the reason you're helping is because you think you have to?
That kind of support feels more like pity to me
Instead of being something you want to do with me

Honestly pity is just another form of guilt
That has nothing to do with me

Friday, October 21, 2011

Dog sitting Grey girl

Is a treat she is a retired Greyhound and sleeps 20 hours a day.
Isn't she cute, Grey girl is our friend Ruth dog, don't see her to often any more that okay. Jane is more then ready to get another dog, I'm the one who's don't ready to get a dog yet. After Honey girl and my m.s. not sure I can handle a dog so I'm dragging my heels. Here are the dogs we dog sit for this is Mr. Owen  he's quite the little man.
We also dog sit for our landlord dog's Goldie and Glenda, they are Mother and daughter and don't get along with other dog's. Glenda the dark one is very protective of her Mom.
They are all nice and I can handle and take care of them, for a week or two, right now that about all I'm able to do. Having a dog and doing right by him or her is a whole another thing, keeping a dog untrained for any reason isn't right. Yes, I know training is hard work for both the person and the dog not doing it isn't being fair to the dog or anyone who interacts with them. It's the main reason I'm not ready for a dog. Now once everyone knows and follows the rules the relationship grows into a bond of trust and love that rarely needs words. The relationships I've had with animals have been better than most of the human relationships, but that's my fault because for me it's a matter of trust. Loving almost all animals, sorry not a fan of mice not even in a cage. One day a may have another dog, but right now I enjoy dog sitting and it's more than enough, they each have wonderful and different personalities, just like their owner's. It's time to make another leaf pile for Grey girl to lay on, it's one of her favorite things to do here in the fall.
  Oh so sweet don't you think

Wednesday, October 19, 2011


It's still hard to believe all the weather records, that have stood for so many years, have been broken within the last 365 day's. Including a few new all time highs and lows temperature, reaching dew point temperature never seen here before. Being aware this is happening all over the world, maybe I'm being small minded for thinking more about my little postage stamp than the kind of shape the whole planet is in.

Now that fall has come I think, having eight days of temperatures in the 80's in October isn't something I've seen here before. My garden is finally done and put to rest until next spring, all the flower, rock and shade and perennial gardens are ready for a long winters sleep. All are very small and not much work at all. Still watering everything it's been a dry hot and windy fall so far, the herb's aren't ready to come into the house just yet. The potted plants and flowers have been cut back and heavily watered, covered and just waiting for the snow. That this year I hope will not fall and stay for a month or so.

There is still much to do before the long cold winter sets in, now we go from keeping the heat out to keeping it in, which is much harder to do when we don't get above 32 degrees for six to eight weeks and when the cold winds of January and February start blowing in, stealing the heat in the house away. Making winterizing now a must. It's next on the to do list for us also doing the last window washing until spring, that is only important to me. So I can watch and feed the birds and squirrels all winter long, maybe I'll even get to see a hawk stop by for a snack, as long as it's willing to take it to go, it's not entertaining to watch them eat. It's what I call my equal opportunity feeder winter is hard on all the animals up here, keeping the balance of nature isn't easy to watch it is however necessary. It's been a while since my last post, now that much of the work outside is done, I'll be doing more writing once again.

So far this month has been too much about saying goodbye then saying hello. I'll be glad to see this month end, it's been an emotional one in many different ways for both Jane and I, it will all work out the way it should in the end, because it always does. It's the transition that's hard on everyone, going from what once was to what it will be. Not knowing what that may end up being or if that too will also end is harder still. The unknown is a troubling place to be.       

Monday, October 10, 2011

The question's of life and death!

A dear friend Karen who is also my caregiver Jane big sister passed away on Oct. 4th 2011 of stage four colon cancer. Karen was a fighter and battled it every step of the way when the cancer moved into the spine soon after that her battle ended. Until the end she stayed true to who she has always been.

Karen will be missed by "her Boy's" as she called her husband Bill her son's Billy and Matt, and her family and many friends I'm so glad she counted me as one, she was one of the kindness people I've known. Jane and Karen have always been close, Jane has taken Karen's death hard, Karen never tried to change her or knock her down or made her feel small. Karen and Jane relationship was build from love Karen was more than a sister she was also Jane's best friend throughout Jane's life, no one stood up for Jane the way that Karen did, or loved her without condition. Their bond has stood up through the good and bad times in each other's life, they always had each other's best interest at heart. I may not be the best judge for this because, I have no sister's of my own but if I did I would want a relationship like the two of them have shared. The closest I've come to the kind of relationship they shared, was with my Mom and that's not the same at all.